What I say and What I mean

Right. So, where were we? Going home. Right. If I didn't write about it already no point doing it now, is there? Let's just move on and skip that part then? Yes. Move into something more topical, maybe? Good. Let us.

Now, examining the newsworthy events of my non-existent life, what do we have?

Something happened and a dilemma has arisen. To commit or not to commit, that is the question. A very illuminating statement, don't you think? I do too. But for reasons many, that's all I'm saying on this. Shameful to censor on one's own blog, I know. But what to do? Too many prying eyes for comfort or for full disclosure. A cue to move the blog to another track? Hmmm. Perhaps.

As consolation, here's another piece of meat. I hate what I've become here. I'm a compulsive liar now. I lie all the time. To everybody.

Prof: How was the class?

Me (thinks): I didn't listen to a single word of it. That's btw, is a record. I thought X-rated thoughts for four hours. But I still smelt the stink. That's how stinky your class was.

Me: Very thought-provoking. Thanks for the lecture. Was immensely helpful.

Y: Did I do something wrong? Don't you like me any more?

Me (thinks): Yes, you did. You exist. No, I don't. Newsflash: I never did. To be specific, I think you're the algae the feeds on the pond scum that lies underneath the sewage in our acrid lotus pond.

Me: Of course, you didn't. I like you. What made you ever think otherwise?

Z: Hey listen, there's this thing for some close friends this Friday. You wanna go dancing? It'll be fun. I promise.

Me (thinks): Looking the way I am and looking the way you do, you are asking me out? Close friends huh? Wow! Dancing? But why?! We were doing so well until now. Can we sit in a corner and make out instead?

Me: I'd love to have but I already made plans. Sorry.

Z: It's cool. No issues. We can do coffee or catch a movie or something, some other day? If you are not already seeing someone, that is. (Smiles)

Me(thinks): Oh, don't smile. That's not fair. What toothpaste do you use? Wait. He asked you a question. Movie. Right. Dark Lights. Limited space. Sharing armrest. Nachos & Salsa. You got it, dude! Any day. You choose.

Me: Err. No. Not seeing anyone. And really, I'd love to hang out. But I'm truly short of time this trip. Maybe next time?

Z: A gentle let-down, huh? (Smile) Okay, I'll let you get away with it this time. But at least gimme a call when you're in town, okay?

Me (thinks): No, don't let me get away with it. At all. I'm one-of-a-kind! That's why, I won't call.

Me: Sure, I will.

Z: Ciao. (Grins)

Me (thinks): I hate that word. Grrrr.

Me: See ya. (Smiles back)

See what I mean. I don't mean anything I say. I mean, I don't say anything I mean. Baah. You get the point! It's like I'm possessed by a good-Samaritan ghost who needs to only say the right things. Whatever happened to the WYSWYG me? Gaaaah.

And, don't ask me why I won't call him. I just won't.

Oh and how can I forget? Cousin's wedding tomorrow! Yeah, the shameless pig that I am, I'm going to be leaving for her city on her wedding day. But hey, I'm wearing a sari for her! Wait. that means jewellery. Damn. Match-making and relatives. Oh F***.

>>Gulp<<

I mean. Help.

Note: Remember. Peace comes from within. Oh my! Shoes. I mean heels. I don't have any. Never mind, they'll come from somewhere. But grace and elegance and poise? Good God. Whoever thought of celebrating weddings. What's so happy about them anyway?

PS: Mission Impossible IV: Finding a way to the Airport without paying as much as I did for the flight ticket. Good luck to me.